About Amanda Young’s
Inestimable Blessings
Lee Calder’s life is right on track. He has a small circle of close friends, a career he loves, and a baby on the way via a surrogate. Mr. Right is nowhere to be found, but Lee isn’t about to let that little tidbit rain on his parade. He’s more than willing to thrust his other needs aside and focus on fulfilling his lifelong dream of being a father.
With his love life in the gutter, Lee turns to fantasies of his hunky neighbor, Finn Alexander. His daydreaming is merely a harmless diversion until Finn comes to Lee’s rescue on a dark and stormy night.
To Lee’s surprise, the chemistry they shared in his imagination is nothing compared to the real thing. Finn is as hot between the sheets as Lee always envisioned. Better still, they get along famously outside the bedroom. The only things standing in the way of Lee having it all are the bundle of joy due any minute and Finn’s apparent aversion to children.
Smashwords Edition
License Notes:
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with.
All rights reserved. No part of this e-book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without prior written permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights.
Copyright © 2010 by Amanda Young
Edited by Jennifer Barker
Cover Design by Amanda Young
This e-book is a work of fiction. While reference might be made to actual historical events or existing locations, the names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Dedication
With heartfelt thanks, I’d like to dedicate this story to the members of my chat group and Dana, in particular, who helped me choose the title.
Chapter One
“A baby is an inestimable blessing and bother.”
Mark Twain
Awe didn’t come close to describing what Lee Calder felt as he stared at a blurry black-and-white image of his unborn child. The current ultrasound was only his second glimpse of the baby. The first time had been months earlier, when the fetus was only eighteen weeks along and much smaller. At thirty-four weeks, the image was much larger. Although the grainy depiction left a lot to be desired, the picture showed a much clearer representation of the tiny human waiting to be brought into the world.
The obstetrician moved the handheld transducer around Dawn Cunningham’s distended abdomen. The machine clicked and whirred as the picture shifted. “There’s your baby’s chest and the little heart. If you look closely, you can see all four chambers.”
With a heartfelt sigh, Lee took his surrogate’s hand and gave it a squeeze. “I can’t believe how amazing this is.”
“I know.” Lying flat on her back, Dawn pulled her attention away from the machine long enough to grant Lee a serene smile. With her long, wheat-colored hair pulled back into a ponytail, Dawn looked more like a teenager than a woman nearing thirty. Her cornflower blue eyes glittered with moisture. “It really is a miracle. Your little miracle.”
“Yes, it is.” After all the years he’d dreamed of being a father and listened to one naysayer after another criticize his aspiration, the main event was now only six weeks away. In less than two months, he would be a dad. I can hardly believe it’s real. His heart swelled with emotion for the little person he had yet to meet but already loved with every fiber of his being.
“What’s that?” Lee asked, pointing at the small blob jiggling around on screen.
“It’s a foot,” Dr. Ballard explained. “The movement beside it is a hand.”
“One of the hands is down by the feet?” Lee tore his gaze away from the baby long enough to glance at Dr. Ballard, a short, thickset woman with raven hair shot through with silver. The few times Lee had been around her, the good doctor had seemed reserved and quiet. Although Lee believed her cold demeanor was due to disapproval of his relationship with Dawn, Dawn had reassured him Dr. Ballard was always a little standoffish but nevertheless a very good obstetrician who’d delivered all four of Dawn’s biological children.
“Mm-hmm.” The obstetrician moved the goo-covered wand around a little more. “Here’s the top of the baby’s head, and wait… There’s the face.” She pointed to the screen. “Just beneath it, you can see his or her other hand.”
“Wow.” Lee stared, mesmerized, at the indistinct features of his child. He could have stood there and watched for the rest of the day.
All too soon, the image moved around a little more and focused in on the baby’s profile. The doctor described what was on screen in case there was any question about the visual. “There’s the forehead, nose, upper and lower lips, and the chin. The little dots underneath are the baby’s fingers.”
The dots wiggled, as if the baby was waving at them, and Lee’s breath stuttered. He didn’t know how it was possible to love someone so much when he had yet to meet them, but his heart was full to bursting with emotion. Lee tightened his grip around Dawn’s small, warm fingers and sent a silent prayer to whatever deity looked out for unborn children. He couldn’t wait to meet his child and get started spoiling him or her rotten.
* * * * *
Six hours later, Lee hustled into Peckers Bar and Grill and cast a frantic glance around for his friends. Spotting them off to the left in the corner booth toward the back of the room, he waved and hurried over, conscious of the fact that he was once again late for their weekly powwow. He smiled as he slid into the booth beside Ted, opposite Jimmy and Sal. “Sorry I’m late. The snow made traffic hell between here and Asheville.”
“Excuses, excuses.” Jimmy picked up the pitcher of beer sitting in the middle of the table, filled another glass, and slid it across the table toward Lee. “At least you made it before the first pitcher disappeared this time.”
Lee caught the glass, making foam slosh over the rim and spill on his hand. He lifted it and brought the rim to his mouth, taking a small sip. “Thanks.”
“So”—Jimmy leaned in over the table—“how’d it go?”
“Things were fine.” Lee tried his best to tamp down his enthusiasm. One or the other of his friends was always giving him hell for hiring a surrogate, and he wasn’t in the mood to listen to any negativity, not when he’d just spent the day with Dawn.
Ted pushed his wire-rimmed glasses up the bridge of his narrow nose. “Just fine? That’s the best you can do?”
“All right.” Lee beamed at Ted. Thank goodness he had at least one buddy on his side. While he’d known Ted a shorter duration than Sal and Jimmy, both of whom he’d gone to college with, he and Ted shared a love of children. Whereas Lee had never given up on having kids of his own, Ted never dared to dream that high. Instead, he taught English at the local high school. “Well, since you asked and all, today was fabulous. I went to Dawn’s OB/GYN appointment and got to see the baby again. My little peanut has grown to about the size of a honeydew melon, if you can believe it. The doc says he or she is about four or five pounds now—which explains why Dawn’s belly is so huge. The whole day was just amazing. Really, really amazing.”
Sal groaned. “You just had to get him started on the procreation issue, didn’t you?”
“Yeah,” Jimmy added. “Now he’ll never shut up about vaginas and uteruses and fetuses, oh my!”
Ted snickered. “I don’t know, buddy. I think it’s great that you’re going through with having a kid of your own, but they kind of have you pegged.”
Lee rolled his eyes and took another long gulp from his glass before he bothered to respond. “I’m not that bad.”
“Dude,” Sal exclaimed, waving his hands, “last week you brought the week-by-week pregnancy book and tried to show us the diagrams. That shit is disgusting. If I wanted to know about the female reproductive system, then I would fuck women.”
“Come on, guys.” Lee looked as his friends and tried to will them to see things his way. “I admit I may go a little overboard sometimes, but this is a huge event for me. I’m going to be a dad. Can’t you be just a little happy and supportive?” God knew he had supported them through one drama after another, from helping them get rid of manipulative boyfriends to lending a hand to retrieve toys lost in orifices Lee could’ve gone his entire life without exploring.
“Oh honey.” Ted patted Lee’s thigh. “I’m totally happy for you.”
“So am I,” Sal added. “I think it’s great that you want to spit in the eye of convention and do your own thing.”
Jimmy lifted his beer. “I support you too. I just don’t necessarily want to hear all the gory details.” He nodded, as if to cement his statement, then chugged back half a glass of beer.
“Hear, hear.” Sal clinked glasses with Jimmy. Then both men turned their glasses up and drained the contents.
Lee shook his head and smiled in amusement. Some things never changed. If he didn’t know better, he’d think they were still in their early twenties instead of verging on middle-aged. “Well, I’m starved. Who wants to split an order of hot wings and cheese fries?”
“That would work.” Ted waved over the server. “I could use something to help soak up the alcohol.”
Lee placed the order for what he wanted, remembering to ask for extra ranch dressing and the blue cheese Ted preferred. Sal and Jimmy ordered a second pitcher of light beer and a plate of nachos. While they waited for their appetizers to arrive, the men caught each other up on what was new in their lives.
Before the other men could get a word in edgewise, Jimmy launched into tale about how his latest trick left him.
“Can you believe Biff said that I was shallow? Me?” Jimmy’s narrow and overly waxed blond brows rose to a comical level.
Lee snorted. “Personally, I can’t believe you were sleeping with someone named Biff. Who would hate their kid enough to name them something so ridiculous?” In spite of himself, the sound of Jimmy’s nasal voice shrieking “Oh Biff, harder, Biff” popped into Lee’s mind and sent him into a round of totally inappropriate laughter that had all his friends staring at him like he was crazy.
He waved away their questioning looks. “It’s nothing. Sorry. I was just thinking about something that happened earlier.”
“Uh-huh.” Sal wadded up his drink napkin and threw it at Lee. “If you’ve been smokin’ the good stuff, the least you could’ve done is share with the rest of us.”
“As if.” Lee rolled his eyes. “I haven’t touched anything of the sort.”
“That’s probably what’s wrong with you,” Sal replied. “You need to loosen up a little.”
“Or get laid,” Jimmy added. “When was the last time you sat on a big fat one?”
Ted groaned. “Could you be any more crude?”
“Thank you,” Lee said. Some things just didn’t need to be discussed in public.
Jimmy leaned forward. “Are you going to answer my question?”
Sal laughed. “Please do. I want to hear this.”
“Fine. It’s been a while. Is that what you wanted to know?”
“Yes.” Jimmy nodded. “Just once I’d like to hear about you scoring some tail. I know you. You can’t be happy all by your lonesome, with nothing to keep your bed warm except your hand and fantasies about your hunky neighbor.”
“I have so much happening right now. I don’t need the added drama of a boyfriend.” He had a life plan, damn it, and he didn’t need a man to help him make all his dreams a reality. A lover would be nice—he wouldn’t lie about that—but he was satisfied on his own.
Jimmy chuckled. “Who said anything about a boyfriend?”
“I want to hear more about Mr. Hunky.” Sal rolled his beer glass between his palms. “Just how good-looking are we talking here? And more importantly, is he gay?”
“Spare me.” Lee shot Sal a dirty look. “The last time I checked, you’re the only one of us with a steady lover. Besides, there’s nothing to tell. He’s just some guy who moved into the house next door a few months ago.”
“Oh come on,” Sal said. “You have to do better than that.”
A spectacular lie was on the tip of Lee’s tongue when the server arrived with their order and saved him from answering. Rather than give him any more hell, his buddies discarded the conversation in favor of tucking into the grub. Lee was thankful. He didn’t need any more reminders of how much better his life would be if he had someone special to share it with.
Chapter Two
Snow was coming down fast and furious as Lee pulled into his driveway. As if that wasn’t bad enough, ice pellets were mixed in with the fluffy white mess. He was damn glad he didn’t have to be anywhere the next day, because the roads were going to be a disaster.
Lee popped the trunk and got out of the car. He walked around to the rear to get his bag out and slipped on the slick asphalt. His right foot shot out from under him and threw him off balance. He pinwheeled his arms, desperately trying to restore his equilibrium.
Before his ass could hit the driveway, a strong hand wrapped around his bicep and squeezed. “Whoa there.”
Lee craned around and found himself looking up into deep brown eyes set in a ruggedly handsome face. Literally the man of his dreams. His next-door neighbor—the hunky man he’d been fantasizing about for months—had a tight hold on his upper arm. “Oh, wow.” Lee’s face heated in spite of the cold. “I mean, thank you. That was a close call.” He used his free arm to grab on to the trunk and steady himself.
“No problem.”
Lee glanced down at the hand still wrapped around his arm and then up at the man it belonged to. “You can let go now.”
“Right.” His neighbor dropped his hand to his side. “Sorry about that.”
“It’s okay. Um, thanks again for helping me out.”
“Sure. The ground’s slippery as hell tonight. I almost fell ass over teakettle myself a time or two since I’ve been outside walking Rowdy.”
Lee glanced down at the weird little dog dancing around his neighbor’s big, booted feet. “Cute dog. What is it?”
“Rowdy’s a Dorkie.”
“Dorkie?”
“He’s a dachshund, Yorkshire terrier mix.”
“Oh, okay. I can see that a little bit.” The dog kind of resembled a fuzzy brown and black wiener dog. Lee bent and offered his hand to the dog, then waited until the pup sniffed his hand and licked his approval before scratching the dog under its furry chin. “He’s a friendly thing.”
“Oh yeah. He likes people.”
“I’m sorry. I think I lost my manners when I slipped.” Lee stood, wiped his hand off on his pants, then held it out toward his neighbor. “I’m Lee Calder.”
The man took Lee’s hand, covering it with his larger paw, and gave a tight shake. “Finn Alexander.” He released his grip on Lee and pointed at the brick ranch next door. “I live right there.”
“Oh, I know.” Heat crept up Lee’s neck once more. “I mean, I’ve seen you around. I always meant to come over and welcome you to the neighborhood, but you know how it is… One thing after another kept popping up and then I’d forget all about it. I can be a little scatterbrained sometimes.” Lee wanted to smack himself as soon as the words popped out of his mouth. Way to make a first impression, doofus…
“That’s all right. I’m not exactly new. I grew up in that house, so I’m familiar with the neighborhood.”
“Oh really? And you decided to move back and buy your childhood home?”
“Not exactly. My dad retired and wanted to move to Florida to be closer to my aunt. Unfortunately, he was never going to sell the house in this market. I bought it from him so he’d have a nice nest egg.”
“That was sweet of you.” Really sweet. Hadn’t Mom always said that you can tell a man’s character by the way he treats his parents?
“Not really.” Finn shrugged. “I was wasting money on rent anyway.”
A shiver trickled down Lee’s spine. “Listen, it’s not getting any warmer out here. Do you want to come in for a drink or something? It’s the least I can do to thank you.”
“Sure. Let me stash Rowdy over at my place and I’ll come back over.”
“Great.” Lee smiled, pleased Finn had taken him up on the offer. “I’ll be waiting.”
He watched Finn cross the yard and jumped on the opportunity to check out the other man’s fine ass beneath tight denim, then turned and entered his own house. When he’d bought the split-foyer home several years earlier, he’d divided it into spaces for home and work, remodeling the bottom floor into a suitable area for his physical therapy clients. There was even a separate side entrance, which was perfect for business. While he still worked at the hospital on occasion, he was lucky enough to have most of his patients come to his house these days. He figured being able to work from home would come in doubly handy once the baby arrived, although he’d still have to hire someone to sit with the infant while he was otherwise occupied.
He headed upstairs, anxious to have a look around before his neighbor came back. He didn’t think anything was amiss, but he didn’t want to take any chances. God only knew what he’d left lying about before he’d ran out of the house earlier that morning. He’d been in such a hurry to get on the road, it was hard to tell what he might have forgotten.
Upon reaching the upper landing, he took a right and entered the living room, casting a wild glanced around his sparse furnishings. A navy blue couch, matching recliner, and a free-standing big-screen TV were the bulk of his décor. Other than a couple of newspapers lingering on the edge of the sofa, everything looked fine.
After grabbing the papers, he turned and walked through the empty dining room and into the adjoining kitchen. He stuffed the paper into the trash can under the sink and spotted a dirty coffee cup sitting on the counter. The spoon he’d used to stir in copious amounts of sugar was lying beside it, with a light brown puddle beneath the shiny chrome utensil. Making haste, he scooped up both and hid them in the dishwasher just as the doorbell rang and announced the arrival of his guest.
Lee’s excitement skyrocketed, while a bad case of nervousness kept his optimism in check. He didn’t even know whether Finn was gay, so there was no reason to get his hopes up too high. Nevertheless, butterflies did the backstroke through Lee’s stomach as he strode back down the stairs and pulled open the door.
Finn stood on the stoop, looking more delicious then any man had a right to. Snowflakes caught in his dark hair and glittered in reflection of the overhead light. For several heartbeats, all Lee could do was stand and stare, caught up in the moment. Finally his manners kicked in and reminded him how rude it was to gape at people—particularly handsome men who were freezing their nads off outside.
“Hi.” Lee stepped aside to let Finn in. “Come on in.”
Finn brushed a hand through his hair, knocking snow off the soft-looking tresses. “Thanks for inviting me.”
“No problem.” Lee started up the stairs ahead of Finn. His skin tingled with awareness of the man behind him. He thought Finn might be staring at his ass, although he didn’t dare peek over his shoulder and check.
He wasn’t lying, per se, when he’d told his friends he was too busy to get caught up in a romance. However, he damn sure wouldn’t turn one away if it fell into his lap. There were still six weeks until the baby was born. In the meantime, no rule said he couldn’t indulge in a fling. He didn’t dare hope for more. There seemed to be some unwritten rule that stated he couldn’t have everything. In the past, if his love life was going well, his career suffered, and vice versa. At the moment, his career was right on track and his dream of fatherhood was about to come true. God only knew what would happen if he dared to fall in love. The man would probably turn out to be a serial killer or something.
Lee led Finn into the kitchen. “I have beer, or I can start a pot of coffee if you’d prefer it.”
“Beer’s good. It’s a little late for caffeine.”
“Definitely.” Lee would bounce off the walls all night if he drank coffee after eight. He plucked two longneck bottles out of the fridge and handed one to Finn. “Want to take these in the living room? I’m afraid I’ve never gotten around to buying a dining room table. It just seemed like a silly purchase when I usually end up eating in front of the television or going out for food.”
“Thanks.” Finn accepted the bottle with a smile, allowing their fingers to skim against each other a little longer than necessary. “I do the same thing. It seems somehow less solitary to eat alone if you’re staring at the TV, doesn’t it?”
“I never thought about it that way, but you’re right. And all this time I just thought I was being lazy.”
Finn laughed. “Lazy sounds better than single and pitiful.”
“You have a point there.” Lee directed Finn to the couch and sat down on the opposite end from his sexy neighbor. He took a sip of his beer while he regarded Finn. “So, tell me about yourself, Finn Alexander.”
“What do you want to know?”
“Oh, absolutely everything.” Lee wanted to know where Finn worked, whether or not he was gay, which way he dressed in the morning…and whether or not he’s gay. The list went on and on.
“You’re not asking for much, are you?” Finn lifted his beer and took a long swig.
“No, I don’t think so. You don’t have to share anything you don’t want. I’ll even go first.” Lee’s gaze was drawn to the long line of Finn’s throat as the other man swallowed. He licked his suddenly dry lips. “I, um… I’m a physical therapist. I work through the community hospital and have a private office here at home.”
“That’s cool. I’m an auto mechanic.”
“Really? I wish I knew how to work on cars. I’m lucky to change my own oil. Maybe the next time I’m in need, I can throw some business your way. Where do you work?”
“Hot Rods, in town.”
“That’s so great. I drive right by that place on my way to the hospital. I always drool over the classic muscle cars in the showroom window.”
“Thanks. The shop’s my baby.” Finn’s shoulders hunched and he actually seemed to draw in on himself as a hint of dusky pink crept up his neck.
The blushing was adorable. It was obvious Finn wasn’t used to compliments. However, the mention of the word baby gave Lee some pause. Should he mention Dawn and the baby?
Most of the men he knew didn’t want to hear about the ins and outs of reproduction unless it was for recreation. Plus, procreation didn’t seem like a safe, neutral topic for small talk. He decided to keep his mouth shut for the time being. It wasn’t as if he was ashamed of his soon-to-be baby boy or girl, but he didn’t want to scare Finn off. After all, the man was his neighbor. It would be nice if they could be friends of a sort. His reluctance to share certainly wasn’t because he wanted to get into Finn’s pants.
“So.” Lee sat back against the cushions with his beer in hand. “What’s your favorite classic car? There was this candy apple red Mustang in the window of your shop a while back. I loved that car. I was actually thinking about stopping to take it for a test drive, but it disappeared before I could. I guess you guys sold it, huh?”
“You must be talking about the ’65 fastback. She was a real beauty. I restored her myself. Anyway, we sold her a couple of weeks ago.”
“If you don’t mind my asking, what does a car like that go for?”
“Ours went for a little over fifty thousand.”
Ouch. Lee whistled. “Wow. Maybe it’s a good thing I didn’t come by and take it for a spin. I do all right, but that’s a little out of my price range.” Not to mention how badly a sports car would fit into his lifestyle once he brought the baby home.
“I don’t blame you. I can’t see paying that for a vehicle myself, but then I can buy clunkers and fix them up. There are a lot of other people out there who are more than happy to pay that or more for something they want. Thank goodness there are, or I’d be out of a job.”
Lee thought of all the money he’d spent so far on surrogacy and the bills that were still rolling in on a monthly basis. “I can certainly understand wanting something so bad you’ll pay whatever is needed to get it.”
“Definitely.” Finn nodded and sipped his beer. “Listen… Thanks for the beer, but I should get going.”
Lee glanced down at his watch and hopped up. “I guess it is getting a little late, isn’t it?”
“Unfortunately.” Finn rose to his feet. “I hate to leave so fast, but I have to be up with the roosters unless I want Rowdy to make a mess all over the floor. I haven’t had him for very long, so I’m still working on housebreaking him.”
Lee wrinkled his nose. “That must be fun.”
Finn chuckled, his laughter deep and genuine. “Oh, you bet. You don’t know fun until you have a puppy treating your floor like a latrine.”
Lee walked Finn to the door and opened it. Before he could second-guess himself, he jumped on the opportunity to extend their association. “Maybe we can get together for a drink or something and pick this back up later?”
“Yeah. I’d like that.” Finn looked at Lee for one long, pregnant moment. His gaze dropped to Lee’s mouth for an instant, then returned to meet Lee’s wide-eyed stare. “I’ll be in touch.”
“Okay.” Lee watched Finn walk away until the temperature drop became too much for him. He closed the door and leaned back against it with a sigh. For just one second, he could have sworn Finn was going to kiss him.
What I wouldn’t give for that mouth to touch me anywhere, everywhere…
After a good laugh at his wishful thinking, Lee adjourned upstairs. He pitched the beer bottles, cleaned up a little, and retired to his bedroom. It’d been a long-ass day and he was exhausted. Driving long distances always made him tired, and that was before spending the evening with the boys and running into Mr. Hunky.
With a groan, Lee fell back on his bed. “I’m really going to have to quit thinking of Finn as Mr. Hunky.” And possibly quit talking to myself like some psycho. It would be his bad luck to blurt that out at the wrong time instead of the man’s name.
He still didn’t know if Finn was bent, but a boy could hope. There definitely seemed to be some chemistry there—at least on his end. Finn didn’t seem to be very talkative, but that was okay. Small talk was overrated.
Lee pulled his shirt off over his head and dropped it to the floor behind the bed. His pants went next, flying off the opposite side of the mattress. With only his boxers and socks remaining, he skimmed his hand down the center of his chest and slid it beneath the waistband of his underpants. Closing his eyes, Lee took hold of his rapidly firming cock and pictured his hunky neighbor.
* * * * *
Upon returning home, Finn helped himself to another beer and parked his ass in front of the television set. Rowdy hopped up onto the couch and curled up beside him, half asleep before he’d even finished settling down. Finn flipped through channel after channel, his mind anywhere but on the rapidly changing pictures on the screen.
He wasn’t sure what possessed him to accept his neighbor’s offer of a nightcap, but he wasn’t sorry he had accepted. He’d been curious about the man since he’d caught a glimpse of the tall blond washing a car in nothing more than a tiny pair of cutoff shorts the previous summer when he’d come by to visit his father. At the time, he hadn’t done more than appreciate the scenery because he’d just came out of a nasty split with Pete. Now he was free, and the good-looking man next door appeared to be as well.
Judging by Lee’s friendly manner, Finn was fairly certain the attraction he felt wasn’t one-sided. With a little gentle persuasion, he could have Lee in his bed, maybe more if they really hit it off. The only question was whether or not he actually wanted to open himself to the kind of vulnerability that came with starting a new relationship. After the disaster with Pete, Finn wasn’t sure if he could trust anyone.
On the other hand, it had been way too long since he went out on date, and Lee seemed nice, not to mention hot. Although Finn didn’t consider himself shallow, there wouldn’t be any point in pursuing the other man if there wasn’t any attraction brewing between them. Luckily, that wasn’t an issue.
His fingers had itched to reach out for Lee the entire time he’d been next door. It had taken every fiber of control he possessed to keep him from grabbing the slender man and slamming his lips down over Lee’s when the sexy man smiled at him. Only God knew what would have happened if he’d acted on the impulse.
Sadly, he fully expected that one little thought to keep him up nights until he figured out the answer.
Chapter Three
The persistent warble of the telephone dragged Lee from a peaceful sleep. Rather than dare to open his eyes and risk blindness from the light he could feel spilling through the blinds, he swatted the nightstand by his bed until his fingers landed on the phone. Lifting the offending object with fingers weakened by sleep, Lee clicked the On button and pressed the phone to the ear not wedged into the pillow beneath his head. “’Lo.”
The ringing persisted while the dial tone buzzed in Lee’s ear. With a curse, Lee flipped his cell phone closed and opened his eyes. The alarm clock claimed it was a few minutes after eight a.m. Too early for a Saturday morning when he had nothing better to do than sleep in until noon.
With a curse, he rolled out of bed and stumbled to the front door. Whoever was ringing the bell was going to die a slow and painful death. All his friends knew better than to wake him up early unless it was an emergency. He wasn’t a morning person on the best of days, but he needed all the sleep he could get right now because he certainly wasn’t going to get more than a wink or two after he brought the baby home.
Lee tugged open the door and immediately slammed his eyelids shut. The bright light set off an explosion behind his eyes, reminding him that he’d forgotten to drink some water before going to bed. It didn’t take much to give him a hangover. Fortunately, this one seemed slight.
“Ah, peekaboo.”
In response to the deep baritone of his visitor, Lee cracked open one eye. Instant mortification clouded his mind and made him want to crawl under a rock.
Finn’s gaze lowered, no doubt looking Lee over, and then returned to Lee’s face. “Judging by the bed head and Scooby boxers—nice, by the way—I take it I woke you up?”
Heat crawled up Lee’s neck and stained his face. “Um, yeah.”
“Sorry about that.” The grin on Finn’s face said the exact opposite. “I just thought I’d stop by and invite you to lunch.”
“Huh?”
“Lunch. You know, it’s the meal between breakfast and dinner.”
“I know that. You do realize it’s eight o’clock in the morning, right? It’s not exactly lunchtime.”
“Of course. I thought I’d be nice and ask ahead of time before I head in to work.”
“Oh. Okay.” Lee was surprised the man wanted anything to do with him since he’d seen him at his worst. Wait. If Finn was asking him out, then that had to mean he was gay, right? Unless it was a friend thing. “I, um…” He licked his dry lips and grimaced. His mouth tasted like something had crawled in there and died while he was asleep. “Forgive me for asking, but is this supposed to be a date? I don’t want to presume anything, you understand, but I’m gay, and if you’re not, then I should probably know that now.” God, he was babbling like a moron. Someone needed to slap him or something.
“Well…” Finn grinned. “It was just going to be a friendly lunch, but now that I’ve seen you in those sexy boxers, I think I’ve changed my mind.”
“Very funny.” Lee’s pulse sped at the knowledge that Finn swung his way. He didn’t know what would come from spending the afternoon together, but he was hopeful. “So, a lunch date, then? Do you want me to meet you somewhere?”
“Yeah. If you could meet me at Hot Rods about one, we should be good to go. I just need to go in for a little while this morning and then I’ll blow off the rest of the day.”
“All right.”
“Great. I have to scoot, but I’ll see you in a few hours.”
“I’m looking forward to it.” Lee stood in the open doorway and stared as Finn trotted down the stairs and disappeared around the side of the house. Once Finn was out of sight, Lee closed the door and backed up against it, releasing a deep breath he hadn’t even realized he’d been holding. His parting words replayed in his mind.
Could I have sounded any dumber?
* * * * *
Panic didn’t set in until shortly before noon. He didn’t know what he was doing. Sure, he liked the look of Finn and what little he knew about the other man so far. However, he didn’t have the time or energy to get involved with anyone right now. Especially his hot neighbor. If things went bad, they would be stuck seeing each other all the time. There would be tension and dirty looks and who knew what else. Maybe I should call and cancel. Except I don’t have Finn’s number.
Even as the thought crossed his mind, he knew it was a cop-out. He could get the number for Hot Rods if he really wanted to. He didn’t. He wanted to go out with Finn and get to know the man better. He liked Finn. What he didn’t care for was the insecurity steadily building inside him. His last date was so long in the past he didn’t know what the hell he was doing. Butterflies danced in his stomach.
He took another look in the wide mirror over his dresser and second thought his outfit. Were jeans and a T-shirt too casual? He had no idea where Finn wanted to go for lunch. The jeans were his favorite—they were worn soft, threadbare in all the right places, and snug enough to mold to his body like a glove. The shirt was the same steel blue as his eyes and fitted to show off the firm pecs and biceps he worked so hard to develop. His short blond hair was artfully messy and his face was stubble free. Although he couldn’t be sure, he thought maybe he looked like he was trying too hard.
It’ll have to do.
Lee dropped down on the foot the bed before he changed his mind and put on something else. Good or bad, this was him. Finn would either like him or not. There was no sense in presenting some false image he couldn’t maintain.
Spying his cell phone lying on the dresser, Lee leaned forward and grabbed it. If there was ever a time to ask for some friendly advice, this was it. He punched in Jimmy’s number and listened to the phone ring while tapping out his impatience on the inside of his thigh. Come on, come on. Answer the phone.
“Hello.”
Lee didn’t bother with pleasantries. He knew Jimmy was compulsive about checking the caller ID before he answered the phone. “You are never going to believe this, but I have a date.”
“What? When the hell did this happen? I just saw you last night.”
“I know.” Lee quickly filled Jimmy in on the night before and waking to find Finn on his doorstep. “This is crazy, isn’t it? The last thing I need is to get involved with anyone right now.”
“Hold on now. Don’t be such a drama queen. The man asked you to lunch. He didn’t get down on one knee and ask for your hand in marriage.”
“True.” Lee exhaled. “But what if it becomes something more than lunch?”
“Like what? You think the guy is going to molest you under the table or something? If you ask me, a little stress release is just what you need.”
“No, that is not what I think. I can’t help but wonder if this is a mistake, though. I mean, he’s my neighbor. What if things go horribly wrong and we hate each other? Then I’ll be stuck running into him all the time.”
“Maybe. But what if things are perfect and he turns out to be Mr. Right?”
“That comes with its own set of problems.” And he didn’t even want to think about that right now.
“You need to take a nice deep breath and calm the fuck down. Just relax, go to lunch, and have some fun. There is more to life than work and surfing the internet for weird little yellow baby crap to decorate your spare room.”
“Purple.”
“Huh.”
“I decided to go with purple for the nursery instead of yellow. Purple can be gender neutral too.”
“Whatever. Listen, no matter what else you do, do not start babbling about babies. No man, especially a gay man, wants to hear about that shit.”
“Excuse me, I’m a gay man and I like kids.”
“You’re in the minority.”
Lee huffed. “That’s not fair. Just because you’re only interested in dick doesn’t mean everyone else is.”
“Do you or do you not want to get into this man’s pants?”
“Well, yeah, but—”
“But nothing. Steer clear of subjects that are too deep. Save that shit for later on, well after you’ve figured out whether or not there can ever be anything more than latex between you. Otherwise, you’re never going to get to the sex in the first place. Baby mamas and shitty diapers are not an aphrodisiac.”
“All right. Maybe you have a point.” That didn’t mean he had to like it, though. Lee sighed into the receiver. “I have to go. Talk to you later?”
“You better. I want to hear all the juicy details.”
“You wish.” With a laugh, Lee hung up the phone.
* * * * *
Lee hadn’t been sure what to expect during the impromptu date with Finn. A short walk to Deb’s Diner and the small talk that followed was surprisingly comfortable. Even the lapses in conversation as they ate were easy, rather than the awkward silence he would normally expect during a first outing with someone new. Finn’s intense perusal while Lee sucked his straw answered the sexuality question better than any words could.
On the way back, he glanced at the slightly shorter man walking beside him and decided to throw caution to the wind. “Do you have plans this evening? We could hang out and do something, if you want…”
“Yeah, I have something to do, actually.”
“Oh.” Lee’s optimism plummeted into the pit of his stomach. Maybe the heady chemistry he felt was all one-sided after all.
“I was hoping we could go for a drive.”
“Oh.” Maybe things weren’t so one-sided after all. “Okay. Where do you want to drive to?”
“Nowhere in particular. I just thought you might enjoy taking one of the cars out for a spin.”
Cars? “You mean one the cars at Hot Rods? Are you allowed to do that?”
“Of course.” Pink stained Finn’s cheeks. “I own them.”
“Wait.” Lee glanced at Finn. “I thought you said you’re a mechanic.”
Finn’s forehead wrinkled. “I am, but I also own the shop.”
“That’s cool.” Lee was more impressed than he was willing to admit. He’d hate to see Finn’s net worth. It would no doubt make him pea green with envy. “Which car did you have in mind for this afternoon?”
“I thought we might use the Camaro. I have a real beauty in the shop. She’s a ’69 Z28 coupe. Top speed is one hundred and twenty—not that we’re going to push it today, mind you.” Finn grinned. “Even if it is damn tempting.”
Lee hated to ask, but… “Um, which car was that?”
“The Camaro is canary yellow, with the black racing stripes. You can’t miss it.”
“Oh. Cool. Can I take a turn behind the wheel or are you just being a car-tease?”
“I don’t know. Can you be trusted?”
“Maybe.”
“Well, at least you’re honest.”
“Mm-hmm. That’s me.” Honest to a fault and boring as the day is long, according to my last two boyfriends. The jerks.
With a laugh, Finn reached out and grabbed Lee’s hand, winding their fingers together. “This okay?”
“Yeah, sure.” Lee glanced down at their adjoined hands and wondered how long it had been since someone had done something as simple as hold his hand in public. He found it incredibly sweet, much like the man himself.
Their hands swung between them until they reached Hot Rods. Finn released Lee and pulled out his keys, unlocking the door. Lee stood back and waited, anticipation building inside him. As much as he’d liked lunch, he was really looking forward to the upcoming drive and being alone with Finn.
Finn led Lee through the showroom, beyond awesome-looking cars Lee couldn’t identify, as well as a classic Porsche and a newer-model Dodge Viper. Finn stopped at a door toward the back of the showroom. He swung it open and motioned Lee to go in ahead of him. “The Camaro’s in the back.”
Lee spotted the car as soon as he entered the garage. It sat off the one side of the room, facing the exit. Finn was right about not being able to miss the bright yellow muscle car. It stood out like a beacon among the plethora of equipment and the bits and pieces of other vehicles currently being worked on. Some sort of vehicle—Lee had no idea what kind—was levitating aboveground on a machine, just hanging there waiting for someone to come finish it.
He walked over to the Camaro and circled around it, looking it over. He liked the black racing stripes that were painted over the hood and extended up over the roof to the back of the car. “Very nice.”
“Thanks.” Finn opened the garage door, then joined Lee by the vehicle. He caressed the hood like it was made of gold. “I rebuilt the engine in this one myself and did a little of the body work. She's equipped with a three-hundred-and-two-cubic-inch V8 engine, with three hundred and fifty horsepower. She has dual exhausts, special front and rear suspension, positraction on the real axle, and fifteen-by-seven-inch rally wheels.”
Lee could feel his eyes glazing over. Finn might as well have been speaking in a foreign language.
“I’m sorry,” Finn said. “I must be boring you.”
Lee snapped to attention. “No, not all. It’s fascinating stuff.”
“Uh-huh. It’s okay. I can get carried away talking about my babies. When this one was brought in, it was a real mess.” Finn shook his head sadly. “She was a lot of work but fun to restore. Let’s get in and take her for a spin. I’ll drive us out and then you can have a turn behind the wheel on the way back, okay?”
Hell yeah. Finn wasn’t going to have to ask him twice. Lee had never driven a sports car before. “Sweet. I promise I’ll be careful.” He skirted around the front of the car, opened the passenger side door, and glanced at Finn over the roof. “I won’t even break any speed limits.”
“You better not.” Finn winked and then ducked to get in the car.
Lee slid into the passenger-side bucket seat and closed the door behind him, careful not to slam it. The smell of leather infiltrated his nostrils and made him smile. “New seats?”
“I had them reupholstered. Why?”
“It has that new-car smell.” Lee glanced at the black matte dashboard. Then his gaze fell on the console between the seats and the gear shift. “Well, crap.”
“What’s wrong?”
“It’s a straight drive.”
“Right. A four-speed.”
“I won’t be able to drive back. The only thing I can operate is an automatic. I never learned how to work a stick.”
“Oh.” Finn’s brow furrowed. “This definitely isn’t the car to learn on, but if you want, I could teach you using my truck sometime. It’s simple once you get the hang of the clutch and shifting the gears.”
“I—” Did he really want Finn to see him being inept? Definitely not. On the other hand, it would give them something to do together, and Lee wanted to get to know Finn a little better. “All right. I’d like that.”
“Great. We can worry about making plans later. For now, let’s get this baby out on the open road.” Finn turned the single key hanging from the ignition. The car started up with a loud, rumbling purr.
“The car sounds awesome.”
“Wait until you hear her out on the open road. You ready?”
“Definitely.” Lee reached back for his seat belt. He pulled it around him and realized there was no lap belt attached. “Um, Finn… I think something’s missing here.”
“Huh?” Finn’s forehead wrinkled. “Oh. No, nothing’s missing. The belts are just separate.” He leaned over Lee, reached into the space between the passenger seat and the door, and pulled out a second belt. “This model came with a shoulder harness and a lap belt. That’s why there are two buckles.”
“I see.” Lee felt like a moron. He hadn’t needed someone to fasten his seat belt since before puberty hit.
Finn clicked the latch into place and glanced up at Lee. They were so close Lee could count Finn’s long, black eyelashes and savor the spicy scent of the other man’s cologne. Lee’s gaze lowered to Finn’s mouth and the trimmed black hair surrounding it. Lee had never kissed someone with a mustache and goatee. Lee self-consciously licked his own dry lips, wondering what it would feel like.